Dear Diary... Sincerely, Anna

Dear Diary, I have always looked forward to college. I used to daydream about it back in middle school because I could not wait to grow up, meet new people and live on my own. I could not wait to decorate my dorm and walk to class everyday. I could not wait to study a topic that actually interested me and work towards a career. Now I am here. Now I am on my own. I live in a dorm, I have met new people, I decorated, and I walk to class every single day. I made it here.  ~ I think the transition to college is one of the most overwhelming changes I have ever gone through. First, you have to plan and organize everything you need to bring. You have to figure out how you are going to get everything to campus. You need to make sure you know how to get to class on the first day. To top that off, you need to present yourself as sociable and friendly, so that you are able to make friends.  To add to all of this, you need to make sure you stay on top of doing all your laundry, dishes...

I never had a “teenage dirtbag” phase.  I have never related to Joan Jett’s “bad reputation.” I never snuck out, even though I have the perfect window next to my bed to do so.  I spent my high school years doing the complete opposite.  My Fridays consisted of studying, writing, and watching tv.  I obsessed over school to the point where it broke me. I was determined to be picture perfect.  A picture perfect perfectionist.   I used to be afraid of discussing these emotions.  I bottled them up until my cup fell over and the glass shattered.  I lost friends and broke relationships with others.  My athletic performances broadcasted how I was feeling inside.  I used to run to feel free, but when my mind was screaming for help,  I was practically running away from the truth.  After a while of feeling this way, I finally decided to flip the switch and reach out to others for help.  Sometimes when you are sinking, you have to kick...

I like to keep letters people write to me.  Birthdays. Graduation. Letters just because.  Cards with silly dog faces.  Cards with birthday hats and cartoon characters.  Cards with homemade drawings and colored pencil marks.  I just went through my box of cards the other day.  I cried.  Happy tears though.  It reminded me of how much I have grown.  How much I have experienced and learned.  I guess you could say I am maturing.  At least that's what my mom said.  I like the way people express themselves in letters.  They tell you how much you mean to them.  They tell you how thankful they are for you. Friendships and relationships end, but paper and pen notes stay. They tell you you're their favorite person.  You're unique Special.  I used to put all these cards on my bedroom wall.  Some ended up getting dusty, so I decided to take them down.  I just put the box back up on my shelf.  It made me s...